How do I encourage communication when my child has expressed suicidal ideation?
This is a very important question. I would encourage a parent to watch My Life Is Worth Living. There are several stories in that animated series. One features a young man who missed a goal on the soccer field, was bullied, and began contemplating suicide. When he came home, his father was worried and brave enough to ask directly, “Have you been thinking about taking your life?” It’s a powerful example of honest communication.
Honesty matters. We shouldn’t shy away from these conversations. Since a parent in this situation has already heard that their child shared suicidal thoughts with a friend, it should not be taken lightly. We want to bring it up, seek counseling, and involve school counselors or others who can help assess and support the child—at school, with friends, with family, or at home.
Open communication means being direct, not minimizing or hiding the topic. We might ask: “Have you contemplated taking your life?” And if the answer is yes or if they’ve had thoughts, we ask: “Have you developed a plan?” Many people fear asking these questions, but we cannot ignore them. Asking directly shows that we’re willing to talk and that we aren’t afraid of whatever the child shares.
If the child does have a plan, we want to suicide-proof the home. Most plans involve one of a few things: guns (the most lethal), poison or medication, or hanging. We work to remove those options. This matters because teenagers can act impulsively—sometimes within five minutes of having a suicidal thought—because of accessibility and spontaneity. Adults are more likely to think through the decision; teens are not. That’s why removing access matters, and why being open and talking is essential.
I’m not trying to scare anyone—just educate and inform. This is a topic we cannot ignore or overlook, especially with rising rates of suicidal feelings.
We need ongoing conversations, openness, and consistent support. Follow up continuously. Invite them to come talk anytime they feel this way: “I’m here. I will always be here. You matter to me. I’ll do anything to help you because I love you and I want you here on this earth with me.” That consistent message is key.
