Thank you. Let's zone in on that just a little bit more, because I have some questions coming in about bullying.
How do I get my child to open up about whether he or she is being bullied or whether they're the aggressor?
How do I have those conversations?
There are two different situations here. Let me start with the first: my child is being bullied.
Usually, there’s fear associated with being bullied—fear that talking about it will make it worse.
So, children often keep it to themselves.
The problem is, if you could sit in my office and hear the stories of adults in their 30s, 40s, 50s, and even 60s who talk about being bullied, you’d realize it’s not something to ignore.
As a parent, teacher, or administrator, our goal should be to reduce and eliminate bullying in schools.
Bullying is a form of psychological, verbal, or emotional abuse—and it’s inappropriate.
We need to take a firm stance and say bullying is not acceptable.
One common concern is that reporting it will make it worse.
That’s when we need to involve the schools.
I’ve talked with many school superintendents across the country, and they’re all concerned about this issue.
When schools are aware, they can be proactive—speaking with the other family or student involved.
As a parent, being proactive shows your child that this matters.
Even more importantly, it tells your child, “I care about you. You matter to me.”
Once you get the story—by listening to your child’s experience—you can make an informed decision.
That might mean talking to the principal, a teacher, or a school counselor.
The goal is to eliminate the bullying.
Now, the second situation: your child is bullying others.
Here, the role is to educate your child—help them understand how to treat others.
Mocking, ridiculing, criticizing others—those behaviors are not okay or appropriate.
But then we need to ask: What have they observed?
Why do they feel the need to treat others that way?
What are they seeing at home or among peers?
As a culture, we have to recognize that mocking or hurting others is unacceptable.
It’s damaging—to the target and the aggressor.
Our society is only as strong as our relationships.
We need to be proactive in helping our children and reducing bullying.
If your child is bullying others, it's vital to teach them the importance of treating others with respect.
And if your child has bullied someone, they should recognize their mistake, apologize, and make amends.
That’s hard to do—but it’s also mature and important.
Taking accountability for how you treat others is a big deal.
