How do I help my 10-year-old daughter with her sleep issues?
Dr. Kevin Skinner:
That’s a really important question, because sleep is directly connected to our mental health. Anxiety and depression are often tied to poor sleep. In fact, both too little and too much sleep can be symptoms or causes of these conditions.
One of the best approaches is improving what we call sleep hygiene. This includes creating a nighttime ritual, such as eliminating media or screen time an hour to an hour and a half before bed. Being intentional about media consumption is essential because screens stimulate the brain and can delay sleep, especially for kids.
Imagine a child getting ready for bed when a message comes in—“Hey, did you hear…?”—and suddenly they're on their phone for another hour or more. The stimulation, the social interactions, and the blue light all interfere with the body’s natural wind-down process.
In the past, with just landlines, this wasn’t as big of an issue—people didn’t call late at night. But now with smartphones, it’s different. That’s why it’s a good idea to leave phones and other devices outside the bedroom.
Blue light from screens suppresses melatonin production, which is what our body needs to fall asleep. So reducing screen time before bed is very helpful.
Beyond screen use, we should build calming bedtime routines. This might include playing soothing music, doing mindful meditation, or deep breathing exercises. Let your child help choose calming music they enjoy to set the tone for sleep.
The body’s autonomic nervous system—fight, flight, or freeze—drives anxiety. If we can calm the body, sleep comes more easily. You might also consider natural remedies like chamomile tea or calming scents.
I use touch as a calming tool with my daughter, who had brain surgery. Sometimes I give her a gentle back or foot massage, which helps her body relax. Not every child likes touch, so you can use other senses—sound, smell, or visuals—to help.
Establishing a consistent bedtime and sleep schedule is also crucial. Children need around 8 to 10 hours of sleep, and earlier bedtimes often result in deeper sleep.
Track your child’s sleep patterns for a week or two to better understand how much rest they’re getting. Encourage them to participate in that process, so they learn about their own needs.
This is such a great question because so many young people are struggling with sleep today. Between school demands, technology, and extracurriculars, it's hard—but not impossible—to build healthy, structured sleep habits.
