Our next question is about a 7-year-old child who is cussing and hitting.
We also have some questions around children who say they like to be naughty.
And finally, a question about compulsive lying from a 16-year-old.
As we come to a close, we want to get in as many as possible.
So, a 7-year-old cussing and hitting, a child who says they like being naughty, and a 16-year-old dealing with compulsive lying.
Any advice you can give on those topics?
Uh, yeah. So, there are some similarities and there are some differences.
Let’s start with a child who is cussing. Did they learn that behavior? Is there some internalized anger or rage?
I would want to see if we could help that child find a safe and appropriate way to express their frustration.
Sometimes, the only way they know how to communicate is through their anger.
So, I might find ways to help them express that anger and let it out.
Sometimes, we would want to look at reactive attachment disorder. In that case, we might need to talk with a professional counselor.
For the child who says they like being naughty, I’d want to know how old that child is, and I would want to understand if there has been any type of sexual abuse or inappropriate activity in their life.
What does "naughty" mean to a child? We might need to ask a few more questions to understand their perspective.
I would want them to be open and able to express what they mean by that.
They might not even know what "naughty" means unless they have experienced something that, in their mind, fits that definition.
So, again, there’s a conversation to be had—an age-appropriate conversation.
That is something that would be concerning as a parent. What does "naughty" mean to them?
Maybe they watched something, saw something, or were exposed to something online.
There are a lot of potential influences, and we would want to carefully help them talk about it openly.
Now, regarding the 16-year-old—what was their situation again?
Compulsive lying.
Compulsive lying.
So, the question—and this is a great question for everyone—is: Why does someone lie?
Is it for attention? Do they get a thrill out of trying to deceive?
Where did they learn that behavior?
Often, we want to look at the root cause. What drives their behavior?
If someone compulsively lies, it’s usually because they don’t want to get in trouble.
Sometimes, it’s their way of being in control—testing who they can manipulate or deceive to get their way.
For some, lying gives them attention. Others get a thrill from it.
This is a situation where I would likely recommend professional counseling to explore possible past experiences that led to this behavior.
In my professional career, I’ve met individuals who use lying as a way to meet an unmet need—something they haven’t been able to express openly.
So, some strategies to start with:
- Talk about it.
- Understand their history.
In this case, professional counseling could help the child gain insight.
I would also want to look at the family dynamic to see what’s happening within the home.
