Is it a good idea to have one-on-one time with each of my children, or is spending time together as a family enough?
The answer is yes to both. We need individual time and group time. Families often spend more time together as a group, but it’s still important to create individual moments with each child. This might be something simple like putting a child to bed, reading them a story, or playing catch or basketball together. It doesn’t have to be long — sometimes five or ten minutes is enough.
Group activities also matter. Families can go camping together, take trips, or participate in shared experiences. The fact that a parent is even asking this question shows care and intention. It isn’t an either-or situation; it’s both.
Some of the most meaningful moments come from simple interactions. Reading a story, sharing experiences from your own childhood, telling stories about grandparents, or even talking about mistakes you made and what you learned from them helps children get to know their parents more personally. These conversations teach children how to handle difficult experiences and communicate an important message: “Let’s talk. Let’s connect.”
As children become more comfortable with these interactions, they are more likely to come to their parents with challenges and adversity. Sometimes those conversations happen in group settings, and sometimes privately. What matters is that children know they can always come to mom or dad and feel safe doing so.
Individual activities can be small moments or larger experiences, while family activities create shared memories. Over time, many parents realize that some of the most meaningful connections happen during small windows of time.
One meaningful memory occurred during COVID when everything was shut down. My daughter was preparing to get married, but because of restrictions, we couldn’t hold a traditional celebration or invite many people. We even struggled to find someone to perform the ceremony, so I became certified to officiate her wedding myself.
On the morning of the wedding, my daughter asked if I would go for a run with her. We went on a three-mile run together and talked about life, marriage, and what she was excited about. That simple experience became one of my most treasured memories as a father.
It wasn’t a grand event — just a run and a conversation — but those are the moments parents and children remember. Treasure those memories, because they are the experiences both parents and children will look back on and say, “Remember when.”
