Asking for Help

Asking for help can ease the burden on a grandparent or relative primarily because you don’t have to do this alone. And knowing that helps.

I know at first it’s difficult because there’s a lot of shame maybe around the fact that you have to, you know, you’re taking these children in, or there’s worry that somebody’s just gonna come and take them away because you don’t have any legal bounds yet or whatever. So you might be afraid to ask for help.

Asking for help kind of opens up the door for you to be able to obtain those legal services, obtain support from other grandparents and kin raising children. And as you do that, you’re going to notice that, “Oh, I’m not the only one out there.” There’s a bunch of us out there, and there’s power in numbers. I mean, you are not alone.

And just knowing that—especially with a support group—coming to a support group every month or every week, wherever you are, can really be an empowering thing. Because you’re gonna walk away not only with a resource that they talked about, but you’re gonna walk away with that feeling of connection that you had. And you’re gonna see yourself in the other people in the room. And that’s very, very powerful—just having that connection.

If you don’t know of any local resources, all you need to do is either—if you’re computer literate—you can go on the internet and Google “grandparents raising grandchildren” or “grandparents and kin raising children.” And you’re gonna get a bunch of different resources that will pop up—some national, some maybe local to your state.

There are also books that have been written, a few books from people that have actually raised grandchildren and kin. And they give you, like, outlined to-do steps. Those are things that anyone can access.