How Do I Help My Child Who Selects Their Friends Just to Fit In?

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How to help children, selecting their friends just to fit in. You know, that's a really challenging one because we don't know who they're sitting by in, in class, and we don't know who they're hanging out with in at PE or recess. And, and so we don't know that. But I can tell you there's certain things that I have found to be effective when my children are engaged in social activities. And let me be really clear, social activities, um, track cross country, basketball, tennis, uh, plays, uh, every time a child is engaged in a social activity or club, that will likely be the people they're hanging out with. Now, I wanna think about that for a second. Discipline. I'll tell you, most people who are in plays, music, drama, right? Sports, the discipline is, is, is a part of the structure of most of these teams and these activities. So getting your child involved in an event, in, in an activity, playing the musical instrument, guitar, violin, the piano, all social development, very, very good because they're developing skills and usually it's going to be utilized in a social setting, in a school setting setting. So I think one of the best ways we can have a positive influence on our children is actually having them engaged in developing skills throughout the early years of their lives. And I think it's just a powerful way to do it. One of the things that I, I'll take away from my wife, who I, I think is just, we have eight children. And, and so, you know, with each of our children, she says, I want them to learn a sport, a skill, and I want them, or a play or whatever it is. And I want them to develop a musical, a skill or a talent across the board. It's been good for their minds, it's been good for their brains. Research on playing the piano or an instrument and math skills and others, uh, social, uh, or, um, like, uh, the core skills, uh, sciences, math. It's, it's fantastic. So again, I think those are some initial strategies. The other part of it is, is there's things that you can't control, right? And your children, they're gonna go out and they're gonna develop friendships with, with people you don't know. Maybe it's the computer people or maybe it's the chest, whatever it is. We don't necessarily know them, but inviting them to come to our house so we can see the interactions. Not a bad thing. So making sure that your home is an, has an environment where your children wants to invite their friends, that's something that we can influence. And I suggest that we do.

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Dr. Kevin Skinner