What do you do if your spouse doesn't see your child, uh, see that your child has a mental health condition, but the teacher, the doctors, and this person sees it, the spouse doesn't see it, what can you do?
Dr. Skinner:
You know, I think if that was my spouse, I would want to understand what their concern was. Maybe they don't believe in mental health issues. Maybe they believe that it is a made-up thing—there is no such thing as depression, there is no such thing as anxiety.
So it may be that my spouse just doesn't believe that. That's probably generationally passed down. As a clinician, I've seen that many times where there are families who are like, "There's no such thing. We made that up."
Well, let's just say, for example, if it's anxiety—anxiety isn't a made-up thing. That is a physiological reality for individuals who have anxiety. In other words, if I test their adrenaline and cortisol levels, it's a real thing.
Physiologically, I can see a panic attack. I can see that panic that occurs. So those are real things. But again, if I don't believe in it, then it doesn't necessarily exist. And in a situation like that, the spouse can't see it, or they might not want to, or they don't have enough information.
So again, I would get more information, and with that information, I would educate my spouse. I would say, "Would you at least read this so you understand what the doctors are saying? Observe our child and see if they are experiencing some of these symptoms."
"Can I give you a task to observe this? And then let's communicate and talk."
So again, I'm not telling them, "Your child has this. You need to wake up and be aware of it." I'm educating and saying, "Hey, I want you to read this so we are collectively informed on what the doctors are telling us. Whether you agree or not, I want you to be aware."
And that's how I would approach it with this spouse.
