First and foremost, it’s important to make teachers and administrators aware of what’s happening at school. If your child shares a concern, you can approach the school and say, “My child mentioned this—could you be aware of it?”
That awareness is one part, but the other is helping your daughter find strength in how she responds. Whether she decides to sit somewhere else or stand her ground, there isn’t always a perfect response. What matters is helping her understand that rejection isn’t about her worth. Social rejection can be painful, and that’s why adults need to step in—to teach and model appropriate behavior and kindness.
Parents can help by asking how the experience made their child feel and giving them space to talk about it. Expressing your own feelings—“That’s not okay; we don’t treat people that way”—also models empathy and boundaries. Let your child make sense of what happened before jumping in with your own reaction.
If your child internalizes rejection (“People don’t like me”), help them voice and challenge those thoughts. Encourage communication and reassurance of their value: “You are good, and those behaviors are not acceptable.” Then, follow up with the school—ask teachers or administrators to observe and ensure the environment is welcoming and inclusive.
Schools play a vital role in teaching kindness and respect. Administrators can empower students to lead by example—encouraging popular or kind peers to act as peacemakers and invite others to join them. One act of inclusion can create a ripple effect of connection.
Dr. Skinner shares a personal story about standing up to bullies and emphasizes helping children understand that their identity is not defined by others but by who they choose to be. The ultimate goal is to help children recognize their strength, self-worth, and the power they have to create inclusive communities.
